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“And even though we ain’t got money, I’m so in love with ya honey and everything will bring a chain of love…” “Danny’s Song” by Kenny Loggins and Jim Messina

Ah, young couples in love for generations have survived on lyrics like these from the 70’s love song by Loggins and Messina.

Remember when material things didn’t matter much and the power of love maintain happiness? Don’t get me wrong, I believe that love does inspire greatness, fairy tales do come true, yet reality eventually nudges its way into life and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Working with many couples over the years I’ve seen the good, the bad and the ugly dynamics that money management brings out in couples. One of the most important things you may do for your relationship is finding the money management style that works best for both of you.

As love matures, many successful couples recognize the importance of financial planning for their overall well-being. MIT and The Hartford Financial Services, Inc. conducted a survey this year finding that couples display three distinct approaches to financial planning:

1. “Driver/passenger” is a strategy which represents 36 percent of those interviewed. This is the “traditional” model where typically the male is entirely responsible for managing the family finances.

2. “Joined at the hip” illustrates the second group who account for 53 percent of couples surveyed. They share equally in all major money decisions.

3. “Divide and conquer” depicts the remaining 11 percent of couples. Of the three styles, researchers found couples who employed this form of money management enjoyed significantly higher savings rates and better returns on their investments than the other 89 percent of the group surveyed.

One reason for these results is that “divide and conquer” requires knowing one’s strengths and weaknesses. This presumes that each partner takes responsibility for some aspect of their financial wellness. Couples practicing this style are more likely to take a practical approach to planning for a wide variety of life events. Of all the couples, they’re most likely to have a safety net in place for the surviving spouse should one partner become incapacitated or pass away. As individuals these partners were best equipped to become the sole money manager should it become necessary.

It’s particularly interesting, especially at a time when investment options are complex that these couples are more likely than others to establish relationships with financial advisors. The “divide and conquer” style gives couples a significant advantage in their ability to respond flexibly and efficiently to multifaceted and changing economic conditions.

Often the most important thing we can know is that we don’t know. Asking for help from your partner and a professional may be the wisest course of action. Identify your strengths and use them and let someone else handle the areas where you may not be as adept.

While every couple is different, there’s much to be learned from the “divide and conquer” couples who may enjoy a better quality of life thanks to a shared approach to money management.

— Accept that each partner will take an active role in managing finances.

— Agree to divide tasks into categories (investing, saving, cash flow and monthly budgeting).

— Pick money management categories that fit your interests and skills.

— Educate yourself by reading books and magazines, joining an investment group or taking courses.

— Establish relationships with financial professionals who help keep you informed about changing economic conditions.

— Maintain clear records and stay up to date so that either can take over, if necessary.

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Darcie Guerin is a financial adviser and branch manager at Raymond James & Associates Inc. at 606 Bald Eagle Drive, suite 401, Marco Island. Contact her at Darcie.Guerin@raymondjames.com, 389-1041 or toll-free (866) 343-0882.