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Most parents are so busy making sure all of their children are getting to school and completing their assignments that some fail to think about what is going to happen to them once they complete high school.

This preparation period usually begins in the third year of high school and into the senior year. Parents have found this to be one of the most important tasks they will ever have as a parent. Many parents, however, have confided to me that it is very difficult to imagine their young child as an adult. I believe this concept is very important to imagine, even beginning in the early years of development. Most parents have found, being able to help their child grow into a teen and then make the transition into adulthood has been very rewarding.

So what happens when you suddenly realize your child is about to begin the third year of high school and you haven’t really spoken to your child about plans after high school? I suggest parents talk with their teen. If you put off talking with an “I’ll think about it later” attitude, it will not get done. Let your teen know that now is the time to start preparing for that time period.

I encourage parents to talk with their teen to consider some general choices. Does your child want to go to college, or does your child want to take some time off to work before facing the possibility of college? If your teen doesn’t want to go to college, what type of vocation or work does your child want to do? I emphasized to my children there was no free ride after high school. I was willing to help them reach their goals, but they were not entitled to sit around and “do nothing.”

In choosing the option of college, I emphasize to parents, it is important to be aware that times are different from the times you were preparing for college. Teens today need to get started earlier because of the extensive research involved and the deadlines for the early admission programs.

It is important that you begin working with your teen to begin writing early. It is great practice for the application process. It doesn’t make a difference if your teen has decided on a field of study, have him/her list their goals as well as their accomplishments and personal strengths and weakness, awards, class ranks, grade point average, extracurricular activities and SAT, ACT, or AP scores.

They should also consider and list the qualities they are looking for in a college. For instance, does your young person want to stay close to home, take online courses, or go away to school?

Once your teen has identified this preliminary information, it is time to go further with the research. Counselors, internet and guidebooks are particularly helpful resources. As this search is narrowed down, it is time to make campus onsite visits so your teen can talk with students attending the college.

After your teen has narrowed the college choices from six to ten schools, while also looking at the odds ranging from high to low of being accepted for admission, applications should be filled out completely and neatly. Most schools require an essay that should be revised until he/she is confident it is their best work.

Sometimes college is not an option or perhaps your teen needs extra time to earn money for tuition. Going to the work force offers many benefits and choices, such as health insurance and tuition reimbursement programs. My daughter did this after she had completed one year of college. She just was not ready. She needed some time. Thus, while she worked full time, the hospital she worked for reimbursed her for most of her tuition. It is a long and hard way to go, but it is a possibility. I know my daughter is proud of what she accomplished and so am I.

Entering the military can also be another excellent choice for a teen who feels uncertain about their future or who believes they can benefit from the discipline, while earning money and saving it.

Helping your teen make the transition into adulthood can also be very rewarding. Good luck!

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Carolyn Katchmar is a member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, a certified addictions professional in Florida and a member of the American Association of Christian Counselors. Address questions to Ethics & Civility, Marco Eagle, P.O. Box 579, Marco Island, FL 34146. Katchmar also can be reached at ckharper@comcast.net.